Elyse Sewell (elysesewell) wrote,
Elyse Sewell
elysesewell

barely legal

I arrived in Albuquerque yesterday and proceeded directly to the MVD, where, against all odds, I was able to renew my expired driver's license in a trice. Praise the lord.

I had to take a multiple-choice driver's test. Obviously, I ignored the MVD clerk's suggestion to study first; predictably, I started taking the test and felt a stab of horror that I would fail and be forced to languish in Albuquerque for eight business days before I would be permitted to retake it. Why not test your automotive acumen by trying your luck at this sample question, which I furtively copied into my notebook just for you!

When and where do most accidents occur?
a.) During winter months due to ice/snow
b.) Where least expected due to driving to [sic] fast
c.) On divided highways between 4pm and 9pm

Figuring that where least expected is where a lot of accidents do occur, I guessed "b." Don't know if it was right. Chose not to examine the breakdown of my "pass," just collected my freshly printed license and ghost rode the whip the hell out of there.

This morning, I'm experiencing the degree of chillaxation that can only be achieved whilst chillaxin on my native soil. If you doubt that Albuquerque rules, dig this headline from today's Albuquerque Journal: "Coyote dumping charges filed. A Rio Rancho man has been charged in connection with the dumping of almost two dozen coyote carcasses in an arroyo west of the city, authorities said."

In other newspaper news, all comic strips besides Maakies make me rend my garment with rage and hate. Though Hagar the Horrible was also exquisitely fucking stupid today, the hilarious comic that most resonated with my soul this morning was the eternally socially-relevant Crock. It's just SO TRUE!!!!! Cunts are always breaking a nail and they menstruate all over everything.
Subscribe

  • hungarian product bonanza

    Új! (pronounced "ooh-ee") = New! Cold cherry soup. I tried this stuff years ago when my beloved Hungarian ex-roommate Olga whipped some up in…

  • my place in the old world

    I may have slept too long on composing this entry: my Euro vacation is over and I'm back in Albuquerque; so much has happened between then/there and…

  • fault linez

    I always scold myself on the kinda-rare occasions that I buy emergency socks or underwear instead of doing laundry: like, how wasteful and…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic
    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 150 comments
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →

  • hungarian product bonanza

    Új! (pronounced "ooh-ee") = New! Cold cherry soup. I tried this stuff years ago when my beloved Hungarian ex-roommate Olga whipped some up in…

  • my place in the old world

    I may have slept too long on composing this entry: my Euro vacation is over and I'm back in Albuquerque; so much has happened between then/there and…

  • fault linez

    I always scold myself on the kinda-rare occasions that I buy emergency socks or underwear instead of doing laundry: like, how wasteful and…